H is for How About You?

I like New York in June, how about you?
I like a Gershwin tune, how about you?
I love a fireside when a storm is due
I like potato chips, moonlight, motor trips, how about you?

I’m mad about good books, can’t get my fill
And James Durantes looks give me a thrill
Holding hands in the movie show
When all the lights are low may not be new
But I like it, how about you?

I like New York in June, how about you?
I like a Gershwin tune, how about you?
I love a fireside when a storm is due, how about you?

I’m mad about good books, can’t get my fill
And James Durantes looks they give me a thrill
Holding hands in the movie show
When all the lights are low may not be new
But I like it, and I like it, I like it, how about you?

8.00pm:  Date #1
“I really enjoy Indian food, how about you?”
Guy #1: Oh. My tum-tum’s really sensitive so I avoid spicy stuff. Plus I hate the smell.

Evaluation: Which 35-year-old man describes his stomach as ‘tum-tum’?

8.05pm: Date #2
“I love going to musicals, how about you?”
Guy #2: Oh my gawd, so do I! Did you catch Jersey Boys? So AH-MAYYYY-ZING right? Love how they were so synchronised when they dance and sing. (hums) Sherry, sherry babyyyyy…

Evaluation: His natural resting pose is jazz hands – probably not straight.

8.10pm: Date #3
“I don’t usually do these kind of things. This is my first time, how about you?”
Guy #3: This is my 5th time. I find speed-dating a much more efficient way to meet people, you know? Cuts away all the superficial crap and allows me to cut to the chase. So, how many kids are you hoping to have?

Evaluation: No, just no.

8.15pm: Date #4
“I go for holidays at least twice a year, how about you?”
Guy #4: Wow, you’re so high maintenance. Is your next question going to be about what car I drive? Well, guess what? I don’t drive. I don’t take home a five-figure pay every month so you can just write me off. You Singaporean girls are just so superficial.

Evaluation: Why is he even here?

8.20pm: Date #5
“I like to cook at home during the weekends, how about you?”
Guy #5: I go to an old folk’s home near our place to play music. I bring the guitar along with me everywhere because who knows when God asks me to bless others through music. Shall I play you a song?

Evaluation: Too good to be true. Also, can’t sing.

8.25pm: Date #6
“I had two serious boyfriends before, how about you?”
Guy #6: I had three girlfriends. And the last one, she’s a terror. She keeps emoticon-messaging me. Here let me show you – what a psycho bitch, right? If she knew I was here . Wait, is that her? Oh phew, it isn’t. So…where were we? Oh shit, that’s her. (Pause). Sorry, but I think I have to take this call.

Evaluation: What did she do to him?

8.30pm: Date #7
“I don’t really want to do this anymore, how about you?”
Guy #7: Same here. There’s still half an hour more to go and I’m starving. Wanna bail and grab supper at the restaurant across the street? They have awesome chilli crab there.

Evaluation: Too hungry to really care. But he is kind of cute.